The Best Confidence Lesson I Ever Learnt

Published by Hayley Gillard on

Last week my Marketing Manager, Annette, asked me to review the social media content that we’d be putting out for the next few days. That’s a normal task for me to do, I didn’t think much of it. I generally make sure I’m happy with branding, content, timings etc. and I sometimes have to complete some sentences or answer some questions in order to bulk out posts and make them personal and relevant.


Last week was slightly different.

Annette asked me a question: what one thing made me confident? She wanted to create a video slideshow to inspire my followers and help them learn something that could enable them to have more self-belief. As an accredited coach and trainer, who coaches people in things like Fear of Facebook Live, giving presentations and having difficult conversations, I HAVE to be confident, or at least understand how confidence works and be constantly trying to learn about it, and role model it myself. But Annette’s question stumped me for a second. My mind flashed through lots of occasions when I’ve remembered conversations about confidence – like public speaking club at school (yes, yes, I was a geek!), my dad teaching me to catch, my favourite teacher telling me I could do it… but none of those occasions stuck as the one thing that made me confident…


Of course, confidence is a growing, changing, ever-evolving process. I’d be a complete fraud to sit here and tell you I am confident 100% of the time. Of course I’m not. But I have learnt to face my fears and overcome them. I have learnt to thrive in a business world that can be cut-throat. I have learnt to go live on my social media accounts despite friends, family and strangers watching. I have learnt to stand on stage in front of thousands of people and not want to scream inside.


The answer to Annette’s question…?


The one thing that made me confident, and the biggest confidence lesson I ever learnt was not something that I was born with, it was not some innate personality trait or something unique to my character. It’s not something that makes me any different to where or who you are right now. The answer…


I realised confidence is an aptitude you can learn, not a skill you are born with.


That means its available to everyone! Right here, right now! You’re never too old, too young, too fat, too thin, you can never have the ‘wrong’ accent or live in the ‘wrong’ town.



You have to read, you have to watch Youtube, you have to listen to podcasts, you have to work with coaches and you have to be open to continuously evolving. You have to be open to grow, to tackle your fears, to face challenges and to work towards your goals.



If your goal is to feel more confident, have more assertive conversations, grow your business by being more visible… then listen to this lesson. Confidence is a skill you can learn. Take action on that. I can help you.


My next Fear of Facebook Live course is coming up – you can find out the details here.

I work with women in business one to one every day to help them overcome their own personal blocks and barriers to confidence. You can find out more about coaching here.


If you’re not yet a member of Self-Belief School, my free Facebook community of female entrepreneurs you can join us here. Every week I do live training, answer questions from members and you’ll be the first to hear about my new courses and events.

Categories: Mindset

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